By Morris Heldt (10-20-00)

Life is hard if you accept conventional wisdom. Perhaps that is why as we grow older each year, a phenomenon seems to take place in some of us. We discover that the previous generation has become much smarter. They appear to us as being more understanding of their destiny than we do. How could this be? We have known since a very young age we had a much better understanding of the world, and the world order of things than our parents’ generation did. After all, we are sophisticated; we understand the pressing of buttons and programming of computers. I have the answers to every intelligently conceived question right at my fingertips. Then why is it as I watch my parents’ generation slowly die off I realize they are more intuitive to birth, life and death?

When you are a baby, your life is simple. You want only things that you need; food, water, and to be cleaned up. When you receive those things you smile and react with love and feel the warmth of acceptance. Conversely, if you do not you react with anger and contempt. Then you live an entire life under a set of different rules, striving for success, usually wanting more than you can obtain, creating angst within. Then suddenly you are old and you revert back to the basics; food, water, and comfort.

I suppose there is no logical explanation unless you accept the fact with age, regardless of sophistication, or breeding, comes an insight to life. I liken it to being a young man or woman in your twenties or thirties, driving your car to any big city, then having to learn your way around, then driving it back to where you came from. After having done it, it becomes clearly an easy task. However, in the effort to do it we become frustrated, angered and sometimes lost.

I am sure I am not alone when I attempted this feat and found, through my frustration, myself making excuses. "They" (my parents’ generation) did not have to worry about all the new electrical systems built into our cars, which breakdown periodically. "They" did not have to worry about the price of gasoline. "They" did not have to worry if someone was going to shoot them once they arrived in the big city, just because you may enter the wrong area of town. "No!" I tell myself, "`they’ didn’t have those worries."

In the study of mankind, we quickly learn that all generations lived under threat. Perhaps in older generations those threats were not publicized as much as they are today, do to media access. Nevertheless, under threat they were. I suggest to you if you take the time to sit down and speak with someone from the previous generation; speak to them like a friend, an equal, and not an assignment or chore to rid yourself from guilt, you will find that you are not that much different.

However, most of us do not like looking up close and personal at the previous generations. The reality of our own mortality is thrust in our faces. We do not want to accept the fact we could end up like them. We have convinced ourselves with the advancement of modern day medicine we will not be like them. We will be able to take a pill, be given a shot, and live to over a hundred, pain free and mentally aware. And, from my understanding, given the right economical support in one’s personal life, that distinction is not out of the realm of possibility.

If in fact that is the case, I ask what your quality of life will be if you can not figure out the formula for perfection. After all, we strive for perfection; in our jobs, our personal relationships, and any endeavor we participate. We are subliminally programmed many times a day how if you are not perfect you are not maximizing your life. How can one live to be a hundred, and beyond, without understanding the complicated formula of perfection?

Webster’s definition of perfection is 1: the quality of state of being perfect 2: the highest degree of excellence. I ask you who decides perfection. Who knows if you have performed to your highest degree of excellence? As I sit here and write this, I have concluded it must be ad agencies, and those people who tell women that in order to be perfect you must look like their spokesperson. Men are told that perfection comes in many forms, huge bank accounts, fancy houses, and prosperous stock portfolios. In essence your basic financial worth and physical look, in relationship to our society. Nonetheless, I could be wrong as I have yet to perfect myself, so I obviously do not have all the right answers to all questions.

However, I have learned in my life, as my years are beginning to add up to decades, the answer to perfecting your life might be as simple as looking at your image reflected back to you from a mirror. It seems to me that since the beginning of time man has tried to find the meaning of life; constantly searching for the ultimate God to give him the solution for perfection. For centuries now in the endless search for perfection we have managed to distort the fundamental issue by seeking analysis for our existence. We have developed many higher powers to pray to, gurus to listen to, and paid millions of dollars to shrinks to compare ourselves to. All in the name of finding perfection within ourselves, so, our society will accept us.

I suggest that a baby, or a person in their latter years, does not readily live for society’s acceptance. They simply live for their own well being. They have mastered the art of simplicity, which consequently gives them perfection. If they are hungry they want to be fed, if they are thirsty they want a drink, if they feel dirty they want to be cleaned. Simple, not complicated, acting on primitive instincts that gives satisfaction.

Perhaps it is only our wanting to be accepted by our peers that alters our basic instinct for perfection. What if one could take the attitude we had as a baby, and will have in our senior years, and apply it to our everyday life. Strive for perfection by mastering the art of simplicity. Look at yourself and simply ask what makes you happy. If you are happy living in a rented house, and working as skilled or unskilled labor, so be it. If you want the biggest house on the hill, and to be the CEO of your own company, that is fine also. If in fact those drives are your basic instincts then even if you don’t achieve them your attempt is perfection. I believe you will achieve harmony within yourself as you are following your internal instinct for perfection, not society’s acceptance. Not unlike the baby who wants to eat, or the elderly who wants to just sit and remember. Basic internal drives might be nature’s way for us to consummate our life’s meaning.

As I am striving to understand the beginning, I am realizing it is not unlike the end. Moreover, the end is perhaps just the beginning. The ultimate answer is maturing and understanding the art of simplicity. Most of us know right from wrong, if we are hungry or not, thirsty or not, if we like, or do not like someone. We convolute our instincts with our fear of not fitting in with society. We ignore the simple formula of what makes us happy. As I continue to age I believe the more simple things are the more perfect they are, which is the ultimate happiness for us mere mortals?

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